A particle's existential crisis

I think one of the coolest things I admire about quantum physics is the idea of a quantum superposition. Now I’m not a physicist, nor do I really understand most of it, but I’ll do my best to explain it.

The basic idea of quantum physics is that a particle can exist in a multitude of possible states before it is measured and observed. If we are talking about a light particle, it lives in a moment where it has a choice to either act as a particle or a wavelength. That moment of indecision is the superposition. At least, that’s how I understand it.

That moment of indecision is a moment of infinite choices. That particle can be anything and everything all at once. All possible states, all possible outcomes, a future full of everything. But that’s not how the world works, isn’t it? At some point, the particle needs to make a choice. It needs to decide whether or not to exist as a particle or a wavelength. Maybe it doesn’t have a choice. Maybe it was destined to be in a certain state. Prior circumstances pushing the particle towards one definite choice. Maybe that illusion of choice defines the superposition, and if the particle did happen to know the future, the particle wouldn’t need to even define what “superposition” really is. Maybe in that case, there’s only one choice it can make.

What would the particle think then? If the future is known, and the choices are already mapped to an already defined future, would that even mean that moments of indecision are even necessary? I mean, if the particle is already hurling towards a defined future, the particle wouldn’t need to think about the existence of all possible states. There would only be one state after the other. A series of events that some higher power or universe has already planned. Like the events of the future are already being played out, over and over again. But the particle doesn’t know that. It just experiences one moment after the next.

Maybe that’s what is meant by “superposition”. Maybe it isn’t so much concerned about what the actual outcome is, but rather the possibilities of what could be. The outcome is still important (I mean that’s what quantum mechanics is all about anyways), but I think the more important thing is the possibility of what could be. The particle doesn’t know the future. It only knows this moment.

And then the moment after this one.

And then again after that one.

Maybe instead of being worried about the outcome, instead of being worried about how there’s an infinite amount of possibilities in that one moment of indecision, maybe it’s best to focus on the moment of decisiveness and the choices follow from that decision. Maybe then the particle can find a reason to exist in one state rather than the other.

By the way, this isn’t about particles at all.